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Volume 1, Issue 9 Editor's: Diggy Dirtshover and Leyara Rin Contents: 1) A few words from the Editor. While Blister is occupied doing all the things he has to do, I shall be the Editor only until he has the time to once again take The Spectator on. So I shall do my best to continue making it as interesting, shocking, amazing, or just downright incredible as he did, and if you have any complaints, suggestions, opinions, please send it in to my scribe. Letters to the Editor
Rise of the Classes Smakem Buckhanna is still retaining his position as Master of the Barbarian's guild. He is still ahead of Cutlich by quite a few points so it doesn't look like the current Master has to worry about losing his title anytime soon. Down in three we have Barracuda Krow the Human who has been known to wear tight clothing, sing, dance, and act merry. Oh wait, that's Stanrar, ah all those Humans look alike to me. Barracuda is holding a tight grip on third and I don't doubt that he won't become Master someday, he just seems to have the potential. Down in four we have everyone's favorite Monitanian, and down in five we have the Thugian Wing Capo that is an item with Wisedeb Gandalf the Frontacian (Aren't there laws against that sort of thing?), In number seven we have Daphinia Arachnia the Arachnian with Jaeger Trotsky the Oog-ra right behind her. Vollid Erfuln and Ogkay Clerio are at nine and ten respectively. Keep up the good work foamers, and congratulations and good work Master Smakem Buckhanna.
1. Smakem Buckhanna the Thugian The Top Fives
1. Purrkinn Well, this is most interesting indeed. Purrkinn, the current Khatyr of the Pride was named the number one most dishonorable Leuian in Spur. She even got more votes than yours truly, me. Following in third place, is Melraath, the Tarr'khat that put new meaning into the word Tarr. Oh and then we have Kassandra, once a thief now a fighter, or is that once a fighter now a thief? Ah no bother. Last but not least is Incense, who I don't really know much about so instead of making something up, I will say nothing..
1. Sweetie And if that wasn't funny enough, now we get to see who you all feel are the nicest Taathians. Surprisingly enough, Sweetie took top honors, Merrimax that crazy lovable nut came in second, wonder of all wonders, Borus is third, Creazor the Hithual and Cyria (don't know her) were voted 4th and 5th as the nicest Taathians.
1. Dakeen and Goldenhands Nothing more wondrous then the deep bond felt and seen between Dragon's and their Chosen's or Bondmates. I only know one of those Dragons and his Bondmate, so I shall just let their names speak for themselves.
1. Banath's tattoo of 'The Grinner' The Grinner landed in first place, not only do we get to feast our eyes on his grinning face but also the grin on his bulging? Biceps. Danetus's 'Prince' came in second, much better I think than say..a likeness to a Dragon's ego?, Demeralda's skull and crossbones was mentioned, then the "something blue' behind Glinka's ear, and Kento's 'giant sparklie' were also thought of as favorites.
1. The red fur trimmed suit Skymath had last year Many of you loved the red suit, stolen? From some big rotund guy during the Rinannimas festival of last year. The clown costume that Puss has came in second place, and here is where things get interesting. Guzzle, since some of you feel he is always in costume, was named, as was Kymberlee for the same reasons, and last but not least is Jazbo, because anything he wears is a costume. Hey, I just took the info I did not name the names! Gladiator's Gossip What follows is Gladiator Gus's exclusive interview with Tasem Tel, Gladiator promoter, arena owner, and father of the not so leggy supermodel/gladiator Annalenia Tel. I was able to track Tasem down to a dark though lavishly furnished private room in the back of Aerhauven's main tavern. Tasem was seated at a small table nearly covered with more varieties of Hithual Ale than I have ever seen. I squeezed my frame into an over stuffed, Hithual sized chair and began my interview. G.G. So Tasem what have you been doing with your time? G.G. Well your fans want to know what has been keeping you from the gladiator
games this past month. G.G. So the rumors about you being in up here in Aerhauven simply to refill
your ale barrels is untrue? G.G. How can I interview you without asking questions? Unfortunately the interview came to an end here rather abruptly as Tasem thought I ought to get some reaction to his comments from the tarks on the beautiful beaches of Tanga. Luckily I was able to make it back in time for this weeks games. Things were a whole lot jollier for me in Spur as Aluiric continued as host for the Tuesday night games at the sold out Spurian arena. The usual strong group of gladiators was present including a rare appearance from the legend himself, Paratwa, in the Killfest. The evening began with a good old fashioned team game. Aluiric selected Sweetie, Cleric, Tulipe and Anvil as captains. Sweetie's group was lead by Yedrow, Zerena, Shlice and September, while Cleric selected Jedaka, Tony, Keaweone and Morlandin, Tulipe picked Tarmit, Armonius, Allie and Vollid, and Anvil had Caldron, Lei, Vilken, and Valphein. For a change all of the teams mixed it up early and when center room was called all of the teams had taken heavy casualties. In the end it came down to a flying Allie and her cacophony of doom vs. Yedrow and his boomerang. Though Yedrow was able to knock Allie out of the air once and bring her close to death the Psion used the power of her mind to rise above the fray, heal herself and finally defeat the head of the fighters guild. The second match of the night was the always popular Killfest. Captains for the event were Caldron, Phrenic, Vorach and Tarmit. Each captain then loaded their team for a specific style of play. Phrenic for example picked flying Psions up the wazoo with the idea to fly his entire team the whole game and dart em to death. Captain Tarmit used his early picks on strong fighters while the other two captains picked more balanced teams. Then as the teams made final preparations at their respective corners of the arena, Aluiric announced that there would be no following this game. The teams scrambled madly thinking up new strategies. Team Caldron and Tarmit unfortunately choose the same strategy of hold the center, effectively eliminating both teams from contention. Team Vorach stayed in its original spot and had Tulipe "like a rolling" Stonetoes drag unsuspecting gladiators from the center to their corner. As the dust settled the winners were unsurprisingly Team Vorach or as Renshi referred to them, "Team Cheese". Snide comments from the crowd were made saying it was nice of Renshi to bring a little "wine" to the party. In defense of their drag em to their death strategy team captain Vorach said, "The beauty of the plan was not in its execution, but rather in it's conception." He then continued to blather on about a thousand swords being turned into plowshares before they ever were removed from their sheathes or some such nonsense. Here are your bloody Killfest Results:
The last match of the night was Aluiric's favorite, pick your own two man team game. The netherworld apparently froze over as all of the usual favorites were long dead when the end game came round. An exceptional number of flying Psions made for an interesting beginning to the match. Clerics were flinging sleep darts at the blued glowies hoping to time one just right, Psions flying high keeping their blues going at all costs and darting when they had the chance, Fighters waiting patiently for Psions to fall out of the sky and jumping on their wounded land bound brethren in the meantime. This continued for many minutes with high casualties particularly among the spell casters and healers. Inevitably no fly was called exposing the two remaining Psions, Phrenic and Allie to instant death from the half a dozen or so remaining fighters. This left the field to the only remaining full team of experienced gladiators, Tony and a zerkin Frith. They proceeded to maul there way through the remaining gladiators bringing the night's action to a speedy conclusion. Tony was so taken with his victory that he announced that this would be his last gladiatory game ever. Special notice should be given to the Leuian team of Kouger and Allisha (sp? keep winning and I will get your name right) relative newcomers to the arena who managed to finish in the money this night. Gus's Stars of the Night
Changeman's Vault Welcome once again to my treasure house of quotes. Thanks to the help of a few lovely people, I have a larger selection this week and I hope you find them entertaining. Please if you hear or heard someone say something profound or amusing, send it to me at Stlkerazzi in the poor quarter. Please make sure that it is true, but out of context is just fine. I need your help to keep this column going. Many thanks and loud applause to Kaori, Reason, Leyara, and Vixen for their contributions and to anyone else that helped. Jullwup says to Crow, "Some wacko monk once made a good attempt at dispelling
some orb-magick." 'Save the endangered Sweeties.' 'My uncle dabbled a bit in de chemistries... now he got one big ol shiny dome.' 'What's the matter, Tarr'khat got your tongue?' 'Now if you need healing, tell me before you reach the moaning stage.' 'Work is something done by those not creative enough to find away around it.' 'I hope you know what to do with it.' 'I have killed more LoC followers than anyone in this room' 'This isn't of your concern swiftfoot, run along to catch some butterflies.' 'Why, I would never stoop so low as to steal from someone else, this is an
outrage!' 'Don't you understand! They do not want to be a Pride!' 'Careful, you'll get stuck that way. Oh, sorry, you already did. 'We have spent months trying to have the Taathians removed, we felt we finally
had them to the point they were hated enough they would be thrown to the wolves.' 'Ahh..well being a 4th stager..I've got scales to spare' 'Does the phrase 'not a chance in Thumper'a's stomach' mean anything?' 'I'm a simple locksmith' 'OK do that God power channeling through your thingy.' Peace For The Dark Rider I do not know how many slavering dire wolves or ancestral spirit wolves ran through the city that night in Spur, how many were injured or if anyone died, but I do know that The dark Rider was not at rest because his resting place had been disturbed and he would never be able to rest till what rightfully belonged to him, his skull, was placed back within his vaut. I came across Loiosh - who had purchased the skull from Beluu, Fawnna, Kyrinne, Starlyn, Nalpac, Platinum, and Obou the Drag-al, the fourth cleric and the one who had done the research into the scrolls making him the experienced one in dealing with the dead, and who also had a map to this poor soul's final resting place where we would be headed eventually after we gathered items that symbolized the four Elements - wind, earth, fire, and water. Four items that would be blessed by four clerics. We headed out of Spur and northwards towards the mineshaft up near Rathan. With Obou's guidance we found an alcove that contained vaults of Rathene Nobility, but many of the vaults were shattered, and they looked as if something from inside them had done it. Loiosh placed the skull box upon the ground and arranged the feathers, wine, and crystal carefully around it. All was going smoothly though until two rotting corpses decided to join us and then it really got wild! Platinum and Nalpac began clawing at them, while Kyrinne tried in vain to turn the first one away. Right after she pointed at the second one and it smiled wickedly at her attempt, it picked up the finely hammered silver headbox that held the Dark Rider's skull! But all was not lost for Kyrinne then was able to immobilize it, and seconds later both of those corpses were sent back to the darkness in which they had crawled from and the skull, undamaged thankfully, was placed back in position. When all was quiet again, Obou blessed the feathers, Fawnna blessed the wine, Kyrinne blessed the crystal, and Starlyn blessed the ceremony with a fire bolt on the wing. And with that, a strange glow then surrounded the box and the items placed next to it - the wing, the crystal, and the wine. Then before our eyes the box vanished, as did the other items as the glow consumed them. And with that the ceremony was complete. Loiosh's Temper Tantrum Last night, during the auction in the pavilion, Loiosh paid 1,350 gold for a black stone vial of some unknown potion, her face lit up so! She then sniffed it suspiciously, squinted at it, and although Kithrael urged her excitedly to just drink it, she sniffed at it again, went west, came back and said to Kithrael that she didn't need it and took the last sip, then exclaimed outloud, "Ack !". After pushing Epicurious down, she hissed, she growled, she threatened, she threw the empty stone vial at him, hitting him in the head I think, and well what it all came down to is that she shrunk by two inches! Let this be a warning. If you are told something has symbols on it, and one points down and one points up, if you don't want to shrink or grow then don't buy them! Think of Loiosh and remember. To advertise..stuff, send in your scrolls to our scribe! Thanks for reading everyone! |