Editor: Diggy Dirtshover AKA Blister Arachnikiller
Assistant Editor: Karma Freeze
Newshounds and writers: Changeman, Sweetie, Flash, Winfrey
Contents:
1) A few words from the editor
2) Letters to the Editor
3) Diggy's Dirt
4) Top Fives - Diggy Dirtshover
5) Gladiators' Gossip - Gladiator Gus
5) Commentary - Vincent Loure
6) Changeman's Vault
Well, I suppose you've all been wondering where I've been, and the Spectator likewise! Well, I have some very sad news my friends. After a valiant battle with the evil fly demon spider, Vekkattraka, or Vikkiclacka, and her friend Lobos, I came out one-handed. Yes, that's right. The evil demon pinned me down in an unfair fight and cut my hand off! It was only through the Flerian Heroin, Boxa Shinytings, that my life was saved and I was able to replace my hand with a digging shovel. There's so much to tell, but if you wish to hear the whole story, check out the Flerian posts! Anyhow, I've taken a new affection towards digging, and have decided to band our thriving community together and work on building ourselves a new city! Only then will we be free from the oppressive spider-demons, and the bird-demons! Well, uhm anyways, until then the Spectator is on vacation. So enjoy this one, and make it last (Try reading one sentence a day)!
-Diggy
Say, spectator, perhaps you know who was in that cottage with the "do not
disturb" sign on it?
- Anonymous
Can't say we do for sure, although it could have been one of Vollid and Kagee's "practice" sessions.
Dear Editor:
I have reason to believe that Silvery the Dragon is conspiring against members of the Spurian basket weaver's society. Just the other day I was lurking in the shadows of town square, as I do from time to time so as not to interrupt any conversation. And I witnessed Silvery harassing an honorable Setite cleric, making threats and accusing a humble basket weaver of Stealing of all things. He was quite vocal and had no proof that he could come up with.
The very next day, I was conversing in Town Square with two members of the basket weaver's society when, who comes running in but a brand new member of their guild, who immediately begged Sir Stanrar for protection. Who should come charging in hot on his heels but Silvery. Flaming mad and spouting accusations, Silvery tried to convince the knight that this innocent Go-blin-al stole from him. Sir Stanrar had no knowledge of any crime, as knights are known to have, and there was even an eye witness on hand, a totally neutral witness I might add, who denied that the basket weaver did anything. Fortunately Silvery obviously hasn't paid off anyone on the knights council and the basket weaver went free.
I am trying to collect more data to back up my theory, but Silvery obviously has it in for these innocent, law abiding citizens. And I for one must question his sanity.Croaker Cutpurse
Sword for Hire
-Question his insanity? No, we're quite sure -- he's not sane.
I offer ye nay greetings ye filth dwelling rodent.
Ye experienced last night what happens if ye transcribe lies about me in that pathetic collection of putridness ye call the Spurian Spectator.
Know that if ye would speak falsehoods about me, I shall remove yer foul tongue from yer rancid mouth. Should ye bear false witness, I shall pluck yer dull eyes from their sockets. Should ye write false testimony, I shall take yer other hand, one digit at a time.
Vekkattraka Arkkatatrrk
-Hrmph!
Don't let your opinion or story go quiet! Write into our staff, and comment, complain, or compliment on a story, news tidbit, or another letter! Send your scrolls here.
Bardic Host of the Recitals, Narcissus Blossomkiller has added a new feature of the recitals--a taunt fest! The Secian Rosi was voted most wicked taunter, after dishing up some of the nastiest taunts!
Remember the Pride Vault theft? Well, finally the Pride has given up on their killing spree of thieves, and only a few were killed (All were able to be resurrected). Sources say, many if not all of the rings were returned by Callar.
Bolt and lock your doors! Some mysterious Muatana-al Necromancers are running about the city, gutting sheep, and leaving mutilated corpses here and there! A Sage by the name of Medares Greymist has been investigating the Necromancy sites, and revealing the darker side of Spurian religion. He is one who believes Moloch to be partly responsible..
Recently, the Secian tree was sick, and dying. Sages said that it was due to the conflict within the race and had disrupted the health of the tree. Fidget organized all the Secians and through some verses and poems, was able to unite the race once again. Through the help of a Sage named Tolian (another Sage studying the Necromancy events), helped them restore the life and light that had left the tree.
As we mentioned in our last flash, the council has disbanded. Meqetlh has become a Lord, and the other Knights have gone their own paths or else joined the ranks of another Lord.
Tasem is still missing. We have Gladiator Gus on the look out for him, but for now Aluiric and Annalenia have filled the gap.
Recently, Rinanni herself felt Cleric disgraced the church in her affair. She was given a hear-to-heart talk with Rinanni, and her faith restored, but, Cleric and all Leuians must rethink how precious the gift of love is, especially that to the Leuians. Now, who says that the Spectator isn't a positive paper?
Speaking of disgraces, Priest of Set, Mamoru has been randomly attacking thieves for apparently no reason at all. When asked Mamoru commented, "Just because I follow Set, doesn't mean I like thieves."
Top Fives
Diggy Dirtshover
Wealthiest Spurian
1.) Katze
2.) Armonius
3.) Stanrar
4.) Jajang
5.) Callar
Katze Offaces came, saw, and he conquered. One of our reporters mentioned even seeing the Drakes shuddering when he came to Peddles. Hard dedication to hunting, and training his skills he became one of our wealthiest Spurians rather quickly. Almost the opposite, Armonius is probably one of our oldest, and most respected citizens. He moved himself up from a simple Priest, to High Priest, and eventually a Lord of manors. Stanrar and Callar seem to have the same story as Katze, just not as quickly. Oh, and Jajang? Let's just say he has a way with words. Rumor has it he almost convinced Symher to sell his soul for a few silvers!
Spur's favorite pet or familiar
1.) The Floating Eye of Becks
2.) Blair's iridescent emerald Bird of Paradise
3.) Lisssa's Guard Beast
4.) September's Black cub
5.) Zuberi's Golem
I have no idea how the Floating eye won..kinda creepy if you ask me! (hint: Never put money on a staring contest with a floating eye). Blair's emerald bird came in second, we have no idea where she got it, but we have yet to see one like it! Lisssa's Guard beast proves to be a valiant protector against those Male lizard suitors. And coming in 4th, we have September's black cub, the majority of votes proclaimed, "It's so cute!" Just wait until it gets older...And, probably the most creative of all, was Zuberi's Golem! Created by the gnomes, it actually worked! Well, not fully; in fact this reporter witnessed it's first attempt to fly. It wasn't pretty.
Best weapon
1.) Borus's ball and chain
2.) Headflinger's rusty steel prison shank
3.) Tracey's Opal Indiscentant night-blade
4.) Armonius's sword of Sa
5.) Guzzle's dead cat
Just the thought of Borus's arms coming into contact with a mortal body is enough to chill the bones. Now, he combines it with his favorite blunt, his ball and chain. We hear it was first sold by Murdach at a peddle, a souvenir from one of the jails. Speaking of souvenirs from jails, Headflinger also grabbed his. It's ugly, rusty, and it hurts.. Tracey acquired a strange looking night-blade, and we are beginning to wonder if she's some sort of an assassin.
Most seductive Spurian
1.) Vixen Vivacious
2.) Tygerlilli
3.) Kassandra and Changeman
4.) Konichiwa
5.) Avea
This age-old topic has almost always been dominated by Koni and Kassandra. This time, Vixen Vivacious has taken the lead along with Tygerlilli, just one vote behind. Kassandra and Changeman tied in 3rd place.
Hungriest Spurian
1.) Smakem
2.) Thug
3.) Borus
4.) Changeman
5.) Hroomha
The Thugians and Oog-ras dominated this mostly, with Smakem coming in the lead. We hear he doesn't even hunt for the money anymore, he's just hungry. Changeman squeezed his way in, some say he's always giving to the poor and has no money to feed himself. Others said he's just power hungry.
Gladiator's Gossip
Gladiator Gus
Hopes were high Tuesday night as the gladiator games known as Tasem's games resumed after a one-week hiatus. Unfortunately the starting time was delayed nearly one and a half hours while the gladiators waited restlessly for Tasem's appearance. Suddenly at 9 Elven Jackenal the human dropped a hole into town square and called for the games to begin. The gladiators well trained by Tasem to wait patiently in the Rose made a mad dash to TSC trampling everything in their path. No one can explain this strange disappearance of Tasem's but rest assured Gladiator Gus is digging deep to get to the bottom of this mystery. So far all I have are several reports of an anonymous Hithual drunkenly staggering about town a few minutes before Jackenal showed up. If you have any information on the whereabouts of Tasem Tel please contact Gus here at the paper. The next step is posting notices in all the local taverns if no one has seen Tasem there than something is definitely wrong.
Strange disappearances not withstanding the games did go on! The first match of the night was a whole arena free-for-all or as I like to call it the hide and seek game. As these games usually go all of the mid powered gladiators hid at the beginning, leaving the field to the most powerful and the foolhardy. Many top notch gladiators to their credit did not hide but with the exception of Netraa none of them survived to finish in the money. After what seems like ages and what I am sure were numerous uses of that all powerful id skill the gladiators popped out of hiding on Jackenal's command. Then the carnage really began as even the most powerful dropped like flies setting up what was perhaps the most fantastic finish in gladiator game history.
At the end of the match with no heal already called Thug and Netraa squared off in the center of the arena trading blows. Netraa out of fatigue using her katana. Thug in slightly better shape tac dancing and casting a spell here and there.
The battle ebbed back and forth neither side gaining an advantage, the crowd sitting on the edge of its seat. When suddenly both combatants passed out from blood loss. A collective gasp went up from the assembled throng as side bets to who would bleed to death first were franticly placed. Smart money was of course on Thug, everyone knows he has drunk enough Thugwiser to bring himself back from the dead let alone mere unconsciousness, and indeed Netraa perished first.
Due to the late hour the second match of the evening proved to be the last. It was a regular team game featuring four teams captained by Thundax, Litorth, Anvil and Panthera. Team Thundax's stars were Lobos, Jedaka, Santos and Barracuda, Team Litorth had Tarmit, Gruber, Phrenic and Sprit among others, while Team Anvil's core was Caldron, Thug, Allie and Renshi, and Team Panthera had Morpheus, Netraa, Prattle and Trawwll. The game was excellent with neither team gaining much of an advantage at first, but as the battle wore on Team Thundax kept its core alive and entered the center room the strongest. They eventually one eliminating Panthera's team last.
Overall a wonderful night in the arena despite the absence of Tasem. Jackenal received high marks as a fill-in mostly due to the incredible pay he bestowed on the gladiators.
Gus's Stars of the Night:
1st Star Thug
2nd Star Netraa
3rd Star Barracuda
Commentary
Submitted by Vincent Loure
What can we do to make our city grow?
The biggest problem our city of Spur faces this day is it's ever shrinking economy. When was the last time you found a wonderful place to hunt and make decent coin from valuables that greedy monsters keep for themselves? Not recently I bet. You see extensive study shows many small reasons why shops buy treasures that were once very valuable for lower prices these days. It's not the dragon's ability to take everything they can, nor is it the Leuians, nor anything of that nature. It's the Arachnians. That's right the Arachnians. They are a plague on our society as one Spurian so delicately put it. They must be purged and wiped off the world. These Arachnians that take are treasure by the handfuls, keep it for themselves, and then sell it by the masses to the traders making thousands of gold coins and leaving the once valuable rare treasures common household trinkets are also the same Arachnians that would attack those honorable, lovable, and fair Secians of our city simply because they have knowledge in Magick. They are the same Arachnians that waged war on the Dragons of the world. These are the same Arachnians that destroyed the high race, and forever altered our world by forcing the Penthanians to use the Unmagick. When Tasem or such comes to town, who is always noted for being the most aggressive and deadly creatures in the arena? The Arachnians with their webs. Who are the ones that kill you simply because they can? Or skin Dragon scales to simply to collect them for alchemy use or religious use? The Arachnians. It seems every time a war occurs, who is involved? The Arachnians. Why can these horrid freaks of nature leave our blessed city and allow us to grow and prosper the way we should? How many of you would stand up for this article if you knew an Arachnian would not take your life? How many of you will stand against this article because you fear for your life? This reporter says it's time to make a stand against these vile, disgusting, demonic, horrific, subhuman creatures of society. This race will surely destroy our city if we do not do something soon. So what do we do to make our city grow?
My suggestion is for the removal of all Arachnians from our city in a peaceful manner; even if they resist violently. Only when these savages are gone will the coins flow, the bickering stop, and the attacks on our friends with magical knowledge cease.
(This opinion is that of the submitting author and is no way supported by the Spurian Spectator.)
Changeman's Vault
Changeman Shadowlurk
Welcome to my storage house of treasures. More valuable than gold and jewels, amusing and interesting things people have said. This week I'll mainly be using quotes from Spur's past. I'll need your help to keep this column going ever issue. If you hear someone say something funny or profound, please send it to me at Stlkerazzi in the poor quarter. Much as I like treachery and character assassination, please try to keep these quotes true. Although out of context is just fine. :::smiles evilly:::
Many thanks to Kagee for her contribution and to all I stole these quotes from. Here is a small selection. Enjoy.
'You were never innocent. You were born in thigh high booties.'
-Marigold the Drag-al Bard, speaking
to Kassandra the Leuian Fighter at a bard's recital.
'Tubanizing. It's when you beat someone about the head so bad, that they are
wearing a turban of bandages.'
- Kbar Predator the Sanene Fighter,
former guildmaster of fighters.
'Smakem is a closet Heart Cleric.'
-some Secian at the trader's
'May the various gods you toil for grant you all manner of speed on your journies.'
-Dellarik the Human Locksmith
'I hate it when she calls my attempts pitiful.'
-Callik the Fir Elf Fighter
'Have you theen my mommy?'
-Bitly Bizybody the Goblin-al Locksmith
(now a runemage), disguised as Reason's 'son' Crazy Valencia.
'AAAAEEEIII'
-battlecry of Grath the Fir Elf
Fighter
'If we are anything, we cherish our possessions fiercely, nearly as much as
our Khits'
-Sammeth Offaces the Leuian Hand
Cleric
'Things are not the most important part of a person.'
-Rosi the Secian
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'Blinking back his wayward tear he sat up and maneuvered himself till he was leaning back against the tree he had slept under. Oh how his back ached, he could no longer hide the pain etched so deeply in the set of his mouth, his tense jawline, his tormented eyes. He never once complained, not because he did not have a right to, for sure, but because he had no one. Unless you could call that crow a friend.'
The above is from the story 'Poor Quarter Man' by Leyara Rin. It may be fiction, but this is a sad reality for many Spurians. For far too long these people have been ignored.
We are seeking donations to hold a charity auction. We need peddle quality items which will be auctioned off at a coming event. All gold made from this event will go to three charity funds....Lady Panick's Orphanage, High Priestess Reason's soup kitchen, and Lord Khatmandu's shelter. Got an old peddle armor or weapon you never use? Bank box stuffed with too much stylish clothing? We need your help and so does Spur's needy. If you wish to donate ESP or seek out Tygerlili Flowerclaw, or scroll her at Marcoll in the Rinanni temple box.
Lust
Power
Greed
Blood
Death
Love
What one place in the booming city of Spur can you find all this on a weekly basis? The Bardic Recitals!
Come see entertainers from all walks of life treat you to tales of passion and songs of war. Every Friday night around 8:30 PM, the Nightingale calls patrons to the stage in the Bard's Guild
Events include: Prepared Entry Contest, Spur of the Moment Contest and a recent
addition...the One on One Taunt-fest!
(This week's subject of taunting will be none other than the Host himself.)
NOTE: The Semifinals are fast approaching. Here is a list of current competitors: Blister, Puss, Aviandha, Changeman, Emmaline, Yedrow and Rosi. Come see these fine writers battle it out in the arena of words for the glorious top prize.
To advertise..stuff, send in your scrolls to our scribe!
Thanks for reading everyone! Don't worry, we'll be back soon enough!
-Diggy and CO.